Tag! You're... suspended? Thank goodness. Our nation's educators are finally cracking down on an insidious evil that imperils our schoolchildren every day-a dark and sinister scourge of the schoolyard... Is it drugs? Guns? Rap music? No. Something even more menacing, even more unthinkable: Dodge ball. That's right. All over the country, those whining weenies in charge of our kids' educations are banning-under threat of suspension, I assume-such traditional schoolyard games as dodge ball and tag. Yes, it's because of injuries-but not the bruises, scrapes and skinned knees you might be thinking of. It's because of the possibility of hurt... feelings! I'm not kidding. Over-protective educators (see also "amateur psychologists") in school districts from at least seven states have recently banned dodge ball and similar playground games on the grounds that they may be harmful to some kids' self-esteem. Hmmm. I wonder how they plan to teach these poor kids to regain their self-confidence-by growing up and suing the school bully for emotional trauma? I'm also wondering: Do these same teachers blame their own failings in life on the emotional scars of having been beaned with a red rubber ball during 3rd grade recess? Do they really think that the reason they ended up miserable and underpaid (in their opinion) is because they were once "it" during a schoolyard game of tag? And what's really sad is this: These misguided fools think they're guarding kids' self-esteem, but they're actually destroying it. Those fragile, untested egos will have a hard time holding up down the road, when the dog-eat-dog reality of life hits them full in the face-and Mrs. Beeswax isn't there to protect them anymore. I have a pretty good idea of what'll happen-and it doesn't take a degree in psychology to figure it out, either. Oh well, at least they'll qualify for teaching certificates... Look, nobody said it was fair, but it's a harsh reality of life that we learn many of the most important lessons the hard way-and some of them come at the hands of our enemies in the schoolyard. And that's also where we learn how to function as part of a team, how to fit into a group (or how to develop self-reliance when we don't fit in). It's where we learn what we're good at, what our strengths and weaknesses are-and how we handle pressure and adversity. It's where we learn to stick up for ourselves, and what we're really made of. No teacher in the world can teach children these lessons. But in at least seven states now, they can prevent our kids from learning them until it's way too late... Action to take: Teach your kids at home. It's their only hope. Still benefiting from my own schoolyard lessons,
William Campbell Douglass II, MD
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